i'm not dead.

sorry people! i know, i know. it's been heck long that i didn't update my blog.
i'm so sorry. i was too busy! really really busy..with my assignments. :(
i hate assignments! ugh! really!!!
so, how's everyone?
i was really shock when i heard that cowie is leaving us soon. it's was on the morning when i was on my way to HatYai, cheesing text me. :( another one...haiseh. ALL THE BEST! we'll be having a gathering/birthday celebration for sai, wen, tee/farewell for cowie this saturday. 6pm! at Ou, Canton-i...*i think. anyway! just be there~ :D

the traffic was so smooth this morning, awfully smooth. i guess, this is because of the Hari Raya? well, i planned to come to Uni early, so that i can ask about my assignment's word limit. i drove from 7.12 and reach at 7.58 ( plus the time that i spent on searching for a carpark...-.-' ) i hurried to that AUP staff room, and find that she won't be here until 9.30am, which is the time my class starts. o.o pooor me. i had nothing else to do, and so..i'm here. :)

yup! i went HatYai that day, Saturday. :) daddy drove there. we started our journey at 6 am. usually, we will arrive around 11-12pm. but, the traffic was so bad. can you imagine we were stuck in a traffic jam in the middle of a highway?! imagine the amount of cars! even the rest area were so bloated! o.o it was really hard...you know, queing up for the washroom. grrrr. and the washroom was not even worth for queing up!! ugh.
but i don't regret of suffering all those and then finally reach HatYai. i get to eat my favourite beef noddle soup! :D it's the best! i can guarantee you that you will never find one in malaysia!! :D yummmy~ come to think of it now....i feel like eating...*bluek. by just the thought, it makes me drool......haiseh. everything there are quite cheap, i guess. like, a t-shirt worth 100Bht, will be rm10. :) yup, you minus the last figure away!! :D :D but i only bought two dresses...and an umbrella. ;p a shower cap, a sanrio file, a PINK HUMONGOUS luggage bag. :D :D hahahaha!! it's only rm299! cheap right? ;p
the only grudge i have? i was able to taste those street snacks this time...was in a 'soon-to-be-sick' status..that's why! mummy wouldn't allow us to eat..those super HUGE FAT prawns! BBQ cuttlefish~~ AHHH!! i'm gonna miss it so much~~
oh! and i touch a real elephant! it was like, one foot away from me. ;p the texture..was so...rough yet tickle-ish! hahaha. :)

hmmm, i enjoyed best during the car trip. :) we chat along, joke alone..talk about future...:) :) hehe. those were great! i reach home at monday and as soon as i got back...:( i had to rush so badly for my assignment..haiseh. :( just finish it yesterday......

love, cong.

bye bye.

i dedicate this song, mariah carey - bye bye, to my lost love ones...brownie, pongo, fifi and simba.

i miss you so..... ... ... ... ...

tell me what to do...



love, cong.

in loving memories of , my dear brownie♥♥♥

today is a long day for me,

honestly, i don't have the mood to blog.

but i had to.

this pain, is excruciating.

i lost one of my love ones,

and ..he had been with me since 1999, almost 10 years.

i still remember when i first got him,

i didn't wanna attend cosmotots because i was so eager to spend time with him.

he slept at my mummy's toilet.
he was still so young that time, so cute, so small...

and then he grows,

fierce, but still cute.

i can still see how he runs, he hops like a rabbit, with his fluffy short legs.

always makes me laugh so big.

10 years, flew by so fast.

i never realise it before it hits.

he watched pongo left us, he watched fifi left us, and simba too.

he watched felix joined us, jojo joined us, jackjack joined us, rufus joined us, and finally the last one he'd see...phumbaa.

he watched me, got in a relationship with my ex, then breakup.

he watched how i met my gang...

he watched we move to our new house. that time, he didn't wanna leave our arms, although usually he only stays like a minute there. .. he was afraid,

afraid that we will abandoned him...

but now,

why?

why did he abandoned us?

.....

i really don't know what to say,

memories seem so little now.

but i know, it's just burried in me.

inside, deep inside...

i saw him growed.

young till old,

hyper till weak,

happy till grumpy...

everytime after i walked him,

his legs will shiver, just like the old ones.

i had took good care of him this 10 years,

of course, this two days too.

i saw it, with my own eyes,

that he had growed so weak...until he couldn't walk anymore.

laying down there, the whole day.

just like any old ones, he lost his self control,

he'd pee as he's laying...

but yet, he called for us, like as if, he didn't wanna do so, but is left with no choice.

i saw him gasping so hard for air...

saw him lost his breathe,

saw him look at us for the last time,

i touched him for the last time,

i know, my hand couldn't let go of his soft fur..the texture..that had been with me for so long..

slowly...he stop breathing....

stiff like a stone..

but then, he was still cute to me..

just like old times...

although i've been through this so many times,

but the pain..never goes..it's still so..so...hard..

i miss him....

so much...

i wish, i could hold him in my arms again...

walk him again..

i just wish so badly he can come back...

i don't wanna lose him....at all.....

brownie...i love you, forever. you'll always be in my heart...

i just wish, you'll get a better life for your next one....i love you so.

may you rest in peace.

p.s//i could see it walking away from us...emotionless. like the old times when we walked him....accepting the faith that we didn't want to..

love, cong.